Shards of a Shattered World

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    songsong1

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    Shards of a Shattered World

    Post by songsong1 on Sun Jul 15, 2012 2:21 am

    ~Chapter I - Already Here~

    The blood spilled onto the mirror as the knife was pulled out of the blue-haired girl's heart. She collapsed onto the ground as her body was carried off by a blue fish-man wearing a robe. The blood-stained mirror was present on the outfits of the girl, the fish-man, and the red-haired girl, who was standing over the mirror, chanting in some language not meant to be uttered by mankind. The blood was absorbed into the mirror, which started glowing. The red-haired girl cackled with glee as the frozen temple started shaking.

    Sablier woke up in a cold sweat. Clutching his head and panting, he stood up and walked down to the kitchen. As he poured a cup of water, he thought he heard a voice calling out his name. Dismissing it as paranoia induced by the nightmare, he drank the water and returned to bed. Unable to sleep, he slipped on his duel disk and activated the duel simulation machine installed in his room. Placing his deck in the slot on his duel disk, the life point counter lit up in a calm emerald light. The simulator produced a hologram of a person, not much taller than Sablier. The hologram had white hair, lime green eyes, and an elegant white and green tuxedo. "This'll be fun," Sablier said, smirking. Sablier stood at the average height for a young adult, and had messy (clearly, as he just woke up) green hair and red eyes. The duel disks on each wrist - human and hologram - shuffled their respective decks as holographic life point counters appeared in the air behind each duelist. The duelists then drew their hands, as an arrow on the ground spun to determine the starting duelist.

    The hologram, keeping the same blank expression as always, drew a sixth card, starting his turn. He set a monster and two spell or trap cards, which appeared in the holographic arena as clouds of fog, and bowed, signifying the end of his turn. Sablier drew a card and summoned Lightray Grepher (1700 ATK/1600 DEF). "Grepher's effect activates - Radiance Conversion!" shouts Sablier in an attempt to sound like a clichéd anime protagonist. Perhaps, he thought, acting like a bufoon will help me calm my mind down. He discarded Ghost Ship and banished Lightray Gearfried from his deck. "Now, Grepher, attack his hidden monster! Shining Finger Sword!" The muscular warrior leaped at the front-most cloud of fog and drove his sword down. The fog cleared, revealing Charcoal Inpachi (100 ATK/2100 DEF). The singed wooden spirit caught the blade and knocked Grepher back at Sablier. The impact shook the duelist, and his life points dropped by 400. Sablier activated Constellar Belt and declared the end of his turn.

    Before drawing a card, the hologram activated the trap The League of Uniform Nomenclature, summoning two more Charcoal Inpachi from his deck, both in defense position. After the deck was reshuffled, the hologram drew a card and activated White Elephant's Gift, sending a Charcoal Inpachi to the graveyard and allowing him to draw two cards. One of these cards, Final Countdown, he then activated. As he paid 2000 life points, twenty holographic fireballs formed a ring around Sablier. After setting another monster, the hologram activated Level Limit - Area B. As the corridor extended from the simulator's CPU, a brilliant light shined, and Lightray Grepher switched out of his fighting stance into a more defensive position. The hologram then bowed once more, indicating the end of its turn. As Sablier drew a card, one of the fireballs faded. He repeated his activation of Grepher's effect, sending Galaxy-Eyes Photon Dragon to the graveyard to banish Magical Merchant from his deck. He then banished Ghost Ship and Galaxy-Eyes from his grave, summoning Soul of Purity and Light (2000 ATK/1800 DEF), who was then switched to defense position by the Level Limit spell. Sablier pantomimed the hologram's gesture as the hologram itself drew a card, another fireball fading. The hologram then activated Lightning Vortex, discarding Flamvell Guard as streams of electricity shattered warrior and angel alike. Activating his face-down Mystical Space Typhoon, the hologram had the swirling vortex of magic consume the Level Limit. Now that it had made its preparations, the hologram sacrificed his three monsters and summoned The Wicked Dreadroot (4000 ATK/4000 DEF). Smiling now, the hologram activated Megamorph, doubling The Wicked Dreadroot's offensive power to 8000. The hologram merely pointed at Sablier as the colossal demon brought its fists down, depleting the remains of the physical duelist's life points.

    As the holograms faded, Sablier had all but forgotten the nightmare, and, with a relaxed mind, removed his duel disk and attempted once more to sleep.



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    StalkerSam

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    Re: Shards of a Shattered World

    Post by StalkerSam on Sun Jul 15, 2012 3:56 am

    this seems awesome , liked the intro drunken




    ^^ credits: DL , songy :3
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    Marrillian

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    Re: Shards of a Shattered World

    Post by Marrillian on Sun Jul 15, 2012 4:00 am

    Now I know what I forgot to Suggest!



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    Re: Shards of a Shattered World

    Post by songsong1 on Sun Jul 15, 2012 4:46 am

    ill probably finish chapter 2 in about 10-20 mins, so be prepared for that!



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    Re: Shards of a Shattered World

    Post by songsong1 on Sun Jul 15, 2012 4:52 am

    ~Chapter II - Puppet Show~

    Sablier woke up, refreshed from his peaceful sleep. After a quick shower and breakfast, he put on a rather ordinary outfit and slipped his duel disk onto his arm. Before leaving, however, he felt like someone was watching him. Shrugging it off as paranoia, he headed out. Meanwhile, the hologram that the simulator had produced to duel him the night before was standing atop the roof of the small house, watching with unblinking eyes. The hologram flickered with lime-green electricity, and for a moment, if anyone were watching, they would see that the hologram had a pristine white sphere in place of a head. Once Sablier was gone, far from sight, the hologram glowed with a lime green light. A teal light appeared on the opposite side of the roof as an emaciated, middle-aged man with so much cloth wrapped about him that he appeared like a reanimated mummy. Like a reanimated mummy with one arm. The hologram crossed its arms behind its back and flickered, reappearing such that it faced the newcomer. "So, Doc," said the man, "Is the kid ready?" The hologram, apparently named Doc, began laughing in an eerie, steady monotone. "However," the hologram said, having a hollow and emotionless, yet still somehow holding an undertone of superiority, "You should testhim. After all, while I was already here, you never exist, Mur." The man, named Mur, chuckled before saluting Doc and leaping from the roof in a bright flash of teal.

    Sablier waved to his dark-haired friend as he entered the dueling stadium. Said friend smiled and ascended to the top of the red pedestal as his opponent ascended to the top. His opponent, a well-dressed businessman with a glove over his left hand, smiled and said, "Good luck, Mr. Noir." Startled, Noir shuffled back a bit in his stand. "How do you know my name?" he asked, confusion and a slight tinge of fear in his voice. "I've been watching a few duelists, yourself included, for quite some time," the businessman said playfully, "Though I suppose, to be fare, I should give you something to call me. So you can call me Mr. M." Sablier sat down in the stands as Noir and Mr. M placed their decks in the slots on the arena. As their decks were shuffled, the machine dealt five cards to each of them. "As a courtesy, Mr. Noir," said the older of the two combatants, "I'll let you go first."

    A sixth card was dealt to Noir, and he started his turn by summoning Armageddon Knight (1400 ATK/1200 DEF). "I activatethe effect of my monster," Noir said, sending Darklord Superbia from his deck to the graveyard. He then set three back-row cards before pressing the small button to shift the turn to the opponent. Mr. M drew a card and cracked his knuckles. "I send Thunder Dragon to the Graveyard to add two more from my deck to my hand," he said. He then summoned Royal Magical Library (0 ATK/2000 DEF), and equipped it with Broken Bamboo Sword, which did nothing but put a Spell Counter on the Library. The audience then burst into laughter at Mr. M's actions so far. Ignoring that, Mr. M activated Cards of Consonance, sending The White Stone of Legend to the graveyard to draw two cards and add Blue-Eyes White Dragon from his deck to his hand. Another Spell Counter appeared, and Mr. M activated Trade-In, drawing two more cards. He then used the Library's effect, trading the Spell Counters for another card. He continued activating various spells for drawing cards, and then a mortified look appeared on his face as he pulled the last card. He ended his turn, and Noir ended his, causing Mr. M to lose by deck-out. As the duelists descended from their platforms, the MC asked the businessman what was wrong. As he was about to leave, without turning around, he said with a tad bit of anger, "I'm missing an arm." He then left, leaving nothing but a teal light in the corner of some people's eyes.

    "What was that about?" Sablier asked of Noir. His friend also seemed a little off-put. "When he was drawing cards, his glove fell off," Noir said, "He wasn't just talking about Exodia." The two friends walked in silence until they arrived at a clearing in a park. They each set up their duel disk and stood on opposite ends of the clearing. Sablier started the duel by setting a monster face-down. As he motioned for Noir to take his turn, Noir laughed. "Bad hand, huh?" he said, drawing a card. Noir discarded Hecatrice and added Valhalla, Hall of the Fallen to his hand. Activating the spell, he summoned Darknight Parshath, which he sacrificed to summon Darklord Desire (3000 ATK/2800 DEF). "Darklord Desire attacks your face-down card!" Noir said, directing the fallen angel as it drove its blade into the fog. As the fog cleared, Sablier's Magical Merchant (200 ATK/700 DEF) activated its effect. From his deck, Sablier discarded 12 monsters before reaching Monster Reincarnation. The Merchant faded, and the turn was ended. Sablier drew a card, and activated Monster Reincarnation, exchanging Metaion, the Timelord for Sephylon, the Ultimate Timelord. Having at least 10 monsters in his grave, Sablier summoned Sephylon (4000 ATK/4000 DEF), another Sephylon (4000 ATK/4000 DEF) and Lightray Daedalus (2600 ATK/1500 DEF) before using the Sephylons' effects to summon Archlord Kristya and Metaion from his grave, matching the power of the reborn to the power of Sephylon, at the price of the effects of the revived monsters. Sablier declared an all-out attack, finishing off Noir. The holograms faded, and the two friends sat down.

    "You seemed unusually quiet, bro," Noir said, adjusting his sunglasses. "Oh, no, I'm fine," Sablier said, staring off and giving a plethora of indicators that, oh, yes, he isn't fine. Noir stretched upward, yawning. "Something going on with Gateau?" Noir said, with a hint of teasing in his voice, and the kind of sing-song voice stereotypically expressed through a tilde throughout the name Gateau. Sablier blushed, and looked away, clearly refusing to say anything on the matter. Eventually, Sablier cracked. "I... I've been having this recurring dream", Sablier said, looking at the ground, slightly trembling. "Sablier, you're 19," Noir said, grinning, "You don't need to feel ashamed about this." Sablier slapped him, sighed, and continued. "Not that kind of dream... This is more of a nightmare," he said, "Gateau is in some sort of frozen building, and then some girl walks in and kills her, and her blood is sucked into some sort of mirror, and then the place starts to shake, and then I wake up. Do you understand?" Noir struck a thoughtful pose for a minute and asked one question, "Was she hot?" Sablier sighed and walked off. Noir eventually walked off as well.



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    Marrillian

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    Re: Shards of a Shattered World

    Post by Marrillian on Tue Nov 13, 2012 4:08 am

    "the hologram that the simulator had produced to duel him the night before was standing atop the roof of the small house, watching with unblinking eyes."
    This sentence is a bit awkward; try rewording it.
    I see some other minor mistakes, but I'll be nice and just point out the major ones.

    Why does "teal" keep appearing? Its overdone unless you are foreshadowing something; but even so, a foreshadow shouldn't be too obvious.

    Lol at the ending. Very Happy

    Overall an interesting chapter: the battles were detailed, but not overly to make me bored; the plot was somewhat hard to follow though (or I am just tired).



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    Re: Shards of a Shattered World

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